Getting so big!

Every now and then you catch one of the girls doing something more "mature," and you realize you've just witnessed them grow up just a teensy bit right before your eyes... It's a great feeling, knowing you're helping to shape them into the person you want them to be. And it's also a sad feeling, realize they're just one step further from babyhood.

For the last couple nights, Amber has started doing a lot of the things I would do for her all by herself--WITHOUT BEING ASKED--before bedtime. She took off her clothes, changed into some new underwear (we were skipping the bath because we hadn't even walked outdoors and I was pooped!), went to the bathroom, brushed her teeth, and got her room all ready for the "bedtime routine," including picking out a book for us to share in her rocker. She was so proud of herself, and I was too, of course!

She's even been pretty good lately about picking up her room (or Audrey's room, if that's where they've been playing). And she never ceases to amaze me how she will help out her sisters--putting in a lost pacifier, handing over a toy, getting a juice cup, etc. She really is a big help to me, even at three! Who'd have guessed? But most anytime I ask her to get something or do something for me when I'm tied up (or hooked up nursing), she generally does her best to help me out. It really does make me proud...

AND YET, why does the thought of her growing up make me a little sad?? I mean, we raise our children so they can be independent and self-sufficient. And we CERTAINLY wouldn't want to be wiping butts and filling up snack cups for the next 18 years, BUT it still makes me just a little bitty bit sad. I guess it's because I just love them so much for who they are RIGHT NOW and am enjoying the innocence and sweetness of these preschool years. And maybe it's knowing that once this day is gone, it's GONE and there's no going back.

I just have to remember that tomorrow will hold joys and surprises (and problems) that I can't anticipate, so I need to enjoy today for what it is and be excited for the promise of the future. When Amber was a baby, I could never anticipate how much I would LOVE her at age 3, so who knows what great things will be in store for us both when she's 4, or 10 or 16?

I think this is one of the paradoxes of motherhood--wanting your children to grow up into great people but still always yearning to keep them as your little babies!